No passion?

So in Bible study we are using the book Pathway to Purpose for Women and today we were studying passions. Healthy passions and unhealthy passions. I came to the conclusion that I have no passions. Nothing that really makes me want to jump out of bed in the morning and get excited about it. Nothing that I am truly passionate about. We all go through dry spells. But come on! No passion?! Nothing?! I guess right now is one major dry spell. Life is kinda blah. Before I had kids and was married I had so many things that I was passionate about. Now there are things I like to do but nothing that ignites a true passion in me. So what do I do? I suppose the only thing to do is fully submit to God's will. As Psalm 37:4 states "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart". I see this in two ways. First I see it that He gives you desires (puts them in your heart). Second He then gives you those desires (fulfills them). So if I want something to be passionate about that the Lord can use I must first delight myself in Him. I must fully surrender to Him. When I fully submit to Him I can delight in Him. So now to surrender to Him. That is so much easier said than done. Stay tuned. This is sure to be an interesting journey.

Season Shock!

I know that the calender says it is Winter but it hasn't felt like it until recently. I am certainly no fan of this season. So I sit here patiently waiting for Spring. Winter can be pretty at times but the temperature that goes with it isn't as pretty. I suppose it is just like life. We all have seasons in our life we may not like but are necessary.

Well there will be a few more nieces or nephews in the family this year. My brother and his wife are expecting in July (their first) and my sister is expecting in September. I am so happy for them. My brother is also taking his bar exam this week. I am so proud of him. So if you stop by before Tues. and Wed. please say a prayer for him. He is rather nervous.

While I am on the topic of children I would like to tell you something about one of my sons. He is a brave soul. Why? He is boldly taking his Bible to school to read when he has free time. So far he has not had any problems with this. I so admire his boldness in the Lord. If only we could all have that. Just think of the outcome if we all were like that. Fearless. Would you take the Bible with you or would you be too afraid of what people would think of you? I personally keep a small Bible with me. I recieved it as a gift from my husband the weekend we got pregnant with this son. I keep it with me in my car but I must admit I don't take it out that often.

Some enjoyable reading.

Joe has a couple of posts that I just got a kick out of. If you are a parent (or not) you might enjoy it.

So little to say today.

Not much going on lately. I am expecting a couple of new babies in our family. Both my sister and sister in law are pregnant. So I'm happy for them. As you may have noticed I changed the colors around here. I was getting tired of the old dark one. I hope you like it. I think it is easier to read. Well that is about all. Like the title said "so little to say today". Hopefully I can come up with something worthwhile soon.

Balancing Act Part 2

Well I quit my job at the store. I got a better offer from somewhere else. It allows me complete freedom and I can be there for my kids if they are home or become sick. So all this week has been a trasitional week. Boy has it made me tired. But all is going good now.


We started another semester of Bible study. Our leader will be teaching out of the Pathways to Purpose for Women book. It looks like it is going to be a good one. She is such a wonderful woman. Our leader that is.


I am so sorry I haven't had the chance to come by and visit all of your blogs lately. Now that I have complete and total freedom with my time I hope to catch up on all my reading.

Happy New Year!!

Happy New Year! May the Lord fill your year with blessings and good memories. *hugs*

The Grinch Who Stole My Christmas

My holiday weekend was crazy hectic. Thursday I went into work (originally had this day off) because they thought it was going to be busy. NOT! So Friday morning I did all of my grocery shopping and got a call asking me to come in at 1 instead of at 4 (I was working a shift for a girl who is pregnant and was temporarily hospitalized. She is fine now.). Went in and the last 2 hours were completely dead. By this time I am completely exhausted. Saturday morning comes and the spouse and kids (who woke up way too early) want the traditional breakfast casserole. So I made it and continued about the day. Hubby was kinda grouchy. Still exhausted I go to bed Sat. night on new sheets that felt like they belonged in a hotel. Not really comfy at all. Had a bad nights sleep and woke up Sunday looking forward to the candlelight service at church. Fought with 6 year old daughter the whole service. She wouldn't stop hopping from lap to lap. By now I am still tired and am trying to keep it all together. Made a big dinner for all of us and continued to watch football. My hubby was relatively nice for this part. Then today came. My MIL came over and "the grinch" appeared. My poor MIL. My hubby was so grouchy he ruined the whole day. *Sigh* So between my grinch and not getting enough rest my Christmas weekend wasn't what it could've been. Highlights? My family enjoyed all the material things they got and even thanked me for all my effort over the weekend. I kept the true meaning of CHRISTmas in my heart. The weather was more to my liking than normal. I recieved a few cards from unexpected people. Lowlights? I knew every gift under the tree. Not a single surprise for me. I was tired most of the time (and am now as I write this) so I was not able to fully enjoy everything. Somebody got candle wax on my nice wool coat. So in all this you are wondering who the "grinch" was that stole my Christmas is aren't you? It was me. I have such a servants heart and I love to give that I just kept giving of myself and didn't stop to breathe and rest. I need to learn how to pace myself. And to be honest I probably would've done more if I had the chance. I hope all of you had a good weekend and I pray that you all will be blessed in the year to come.

Merry Christmas!

Wishing all of you a Merry Christmas! May the Lord bless you this Christmas season and in the year to come. Hugs for all!!!

Balancing Act

Creating a proper balance in my life has been a challenge. To try to get the proper balance between kids, spouse, work, God, and some recreational activities has been a learning experience for me. I started a job full time and it tilted my scales away from my precious children. So by backing off to part time I now have a good balance between work and family. Before I had no recreational time for myself and spent all my time at home wondering what it would be like to "have a life". I have gotten involved with a Bible Study and occasionally help out with some projects around the church. So after many trials and errors I think I may have it. My next challenge is learning to say no to people.


Finally got my decorations up. I thought I would never get to them. Had a situation with the tree lights though. Man can they be a bugger to figure out. If half of a row on a pre-lit tree isn't working boy does it become hard to find the problem and the solution. After an hour of both my and my husband looking at it and trying to figure it out we found out simple solutions. One was a wire was kinked and the other was a bulb was broken. My hands look like I have a cat. You know the scratches that they can leave on your hands when they are little and playing? I have similar ones on my hands.

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Happy Thanksgiving to all!! I have been neglecting this thing for a while now and am sorry. But in the meantime life has gone very fast. The job is going well. Hubby has a new job too. Got a new fish. Replaced some that were terrorizing the others. We replaced two with one black angel fish. We named her Max. My thought process on naming it Max. Black angel fish=dark angel(the show)=Max. Well I am done taking up your time. Have a good Thanksgiving.

My 2 cents

Flannel Avenger has the next in the Bible study up. Also check out Alyfireman. Who is Jesus? We tend to think of Jesus as loving. Yes Jesus was loving but He is God.God isn't always nice. Remember the flood? God is a just God but that doesn't mean politically correct. One of the wonderful things about Him is He is unchanging. He doesn't care about being all "p.c.". You always know what He expects of you. He wrote it in a book (the Bible) so that there would be no doubt. If He says no, He means no. No reasoning, bargaining, pleading, or trying to sway Him one way or another. Who is Jesus? He is. The important thing is He is unchanging, all powerful, all knowing, and everywhere. Forgive me but my mind is drawn to Jesus in his last days. He wept, He hurt, He felt. I think of how His feet must have hurt from walking all the time. How betrayed he probably felt. God as Jesus suffered. Not just physically but I think also emotionally. So if you ask who was Jesus as a human all I can offer you is He felt as a human but had the mind of God.


My question is what do you think about Him being all powerful, all knowing and everywhere?

What A Week!!!

Boy has this week gone by really fast! I went to Bible Study on Tuesday (which I am really enjoying by the way) and heard about a job at an outlet store nearby. So I figured I would stop in and put in an application on Wednesday. Well Wednesday morning is when it all went up in the air. I went in (before hubby and I went out for an anniversary lunch) to apply for the job. They hired me on the spot starting the next day (Thursday). So I started on Thursday and worked yesterday too and again tomorrow. I hadn't planned on being thrust back into the workforce so quickly. I thought I would have a week to get home stuff situated. NOPE! So that is how everything got thrown up into the air. Ahhh....to sit and relax. Needless to say I am juggling my new job, home duties, and another job of cleaning my apt. building. Then, as if it couldn't get more hectic, the apt. people called me and asked me if I could also clean the clubhouse. Well they apply a certain amount of $ to my rent so I would be stupid to say no. So I said yes. I start that on Monday. Now it is gonna take a few weeks to get everything under control and situated. So if you don't see me around here much in the next few days that is why. I hope all of you are doing well and are enjoying the beauty of Autumn.

Not much to say.

Well I know it has been a while. I don't really have much to say. I am enjoying seeing the seasonal color changes though. Hopefully soon I will have more to say. Maybe even something worthwhile. lol

Early morning thoughts

I am not usually up this early so I figured it would be a good time to come here and babble a little.

My son did excellent with his oral surgery. Not only was it pain free for the little guy but it was also cheaper than expected for me. He is such a brave little one. We have definitely had the favor of the Lord on this issue. There was only one problem after the surgery. He couldn't keep anything down until mid to late morning the next day. Now he eats more than ever! It is cute to see him do his tongue exercises. He has to stick it out as far as he can and up as far as he can. So we walk around the house sticking our tongues out at him to remind him to stick his out and up.

All of the fish are doing well. I found out something last night. That freezing a fish is not the most humane way to put them down. Now I am feeling a little guilty and heartbroken. My husband was doing a search on the proper water temp for our fish and came across some breeders that say how to put your fish to sleep if need be. Their suggestions?

1. Decapitate them. (Nope..Not me...Couldn't do it!)

2.Inject them with a certain solution into the belly. (Now where am I gonna get the needle or the solution?)

3.Put them in a glass with water and vodka. It makes them go to sleep in a more humane manner. (Hmmm....seems doable.)

Then they went on to say if you cannot do any of these to take the fish to the local university and they can study the disease of the fish or whatever. That is the last thing I would want to do. I am trying to put the poor fish out of its misery and they want to keep him alive and study him and take him apart and such. So now I know what to do if I ever need to put a fish to sleep again.

On a more personal note the Lord has really been dealing with me and my self image issues and some other issues I didn't even know I had. And also for the past two weeks in a row someone from my past has been brought into my present. Two weeks ago I was putting my groceries away and reflecting on the mornings women's bible study and the Lord told me to call my biological mother. Well after a few minutes of trying to get out of it I finally obeyed. I called her later that evening and was pleasantly surprised. She had changed some from the women I used to know. Which is a good thing. Next came a few days ago. My half sister from my dads last marriage contacted me through Classmates. Now the way she described herself makes my husband not want anything to do with her. She has some tattoos and a few piercings. But I feel like she was brought back into my life for a reason. For all I know I may be the only Christian she may know. I have to show her the love of Jesus. He didn't turn people away. He welcomes them in. Now I may not be able to welcome her into my home but I will certainly love her. It's not her fault we were not able to grow up together.

Huge, creepy, nasty, spider!

As I was sleeping last night I felt something on my face. That is not unusual since I have long hair and it lands in my face a lot. So I brush it off my face. A few seconds later my husband brushes something off his face. Yet another second or two later I brush same something off my arm. Being a little freaked out I turned on the light. There on the middle of my side of the bed was a Huge, Creepy, Nasty, spider. Hubby killed it but *shudders* I was creeped out. I was so creeped out I had a hard time sleeping. Now every time something touches me ever so lightly I get creeped out thinking it is another spider. Mind you that this is no ordinary spider. Not the kind you see in the house. It is one of those big ones you see in the woods that you run the other way from.


So now I have told all of that I will also tell you a little more about my week. My grandpa died on Wed. night, my mother in law needs a second MRI to determine if the thing they found is a aneurism or not, and I have enjoyed my time spent with the ladies at church. We made apple pies for today's craft/bake sale. I went this morning and bought a couple of those pies and some zucchini bread, a bunch of cookies, and a church cookbook.

So much in one week. Maybe this afternoon I will get a nap.

Tongue-tie

It was brought to my attention yesterday that my son has this birth defect. He is almost 8. Why wasn't it noticed when he was younger? It would've helped him in eating when he was an infant. I am quite upset (especially at myself) that it wasn't noticed until now. What is it you ask? It is where that thing that connects our tongues to the bottom of your mouth is too short and the person cannot move their tongue in a normal fashion. It can cause speech issues (which is how I found out through his speech teacher), it can cause difficulty in breastfeeding (he had this), and can cause social issues as well. If it had been caught when he was an infant it would've been an easy procedure and we would have had insurance coverage. Now it needs to be done under general as an outpatient and all without us having insurance. Apparantly they go in and cut this thing and stitch it so that he can freely move his tongue. It is a hereditary birth thing so now I know how he got it. It must have come from my hubby's side. He's adopted. So can you please keep us in your prayers as we figure out how to pay for this and to find a doctor that we can trust. My son isn't worried about it at all.

The latest in the tank

Well last week was a buzz of fish frenzy in our house. Mr. Bubbles is gone and we had to replace him with new fish. Ping and Catgirl are still in there. (Monday)We started out by getting two Serpae tetras (Bella and Bullet) and two tiger barbs. One of the barbs got kinda mean and nasty so he was terminated. So we got a danio golden zebra tetra (Princess) to replace it.(Tuesday) Then the other barb decided he wanted to be nasty and was terminated. So we replaced it with a red-eyed tetra (Arrow). (By now you can tell which ones my boys named and which ones my and my daughter named.) Now Wednesday comes and the kids got out of school at noon. Guess what? At 11:00 Princess dies and I need to take her back to the pet store. They tell me they need a seperate sample of the water in order to either give me a new fish or my money back. So it is now 11:30 and I head back to the store with the water sample. It is high in nitrates so he tells me he will replace Princess but when I get home I need to do a 25% water change. So now I have 15 minutes to do the water change and get to the school to pick up kids. I successfully did this and my daughter is none the wiser. Princess is now fine. Yes it is still Princess because my daughter is clueless. So all is finally well in the tank.

A sad day...

Today as I went to change Mr. Bubbles' water and I got to take a good look at him. Half of his face was eaten by this fungus thing and he was having problems getting air. So I had to put him to sleep. I cried and cried and cried. To others it may seem silly to cry over a fish. But not to me. Mr. Bubbles was a unique fish. He let me pet his back and he was always excited to see me. If it was anyone else he would swim away. We had him for little over a year. I couldn't help but cry.

Excitement!

Okay so I am finally getting a life. I went to a women's bible study today. I came out of there so filled and refreshed and felt so much better. So I am excited. I am walking with a spring in my step and a smile on my face. I am getting more involved in the women's ministries by helping out with a few things. I have always had a hard time going out and doing things on my own without a friend or a kid or my husband. This week I did 2 things all on my own. I went to the Jeremy Camp Restored concert and had a blast and I went to the bible study today. I have found out I like doing things by myself. Strangely enough I feel like I can be myself instead of putting up a front.

Short and Sweet

The sweetest thing happened the other day. My middle child came out of his room with an expectant look on his face. We looked at him and asked him what he wanted. He said "You called my name." We said that no we didn't. His next response...."I know! It was God!". I just thought that was the sweetest thing.